Diapers and Dragons

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

There's a Yellow Brick Road There, Right?

I've decided to move to Australia.

This may seem sudden, but really it's not that surprising. I mean, I've been intruigued by Australia for a long time, ever since I read the classic Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst. Obviously Australia is the first choice for asylum in an unfriendly world.

Besides, I have a very dear friend who already lives there and has a habit of taking in lost souls while they get back on their feet, so I'd be set for that. And upon checking the immigration requirements, it appears that I have a limited time frame: I only have 14 years remaining before I'm too old to move there. Apparently they don't want a bunch of senior citizens using them as the international Florida.

Though, like Florida, weather is balmy and beautiful in Australia this time of year. Since Michigan just decided to let Winter come blowing back through in defiance of the calendar that CLEARLY says it's Spring, that sounds good to me.

Now, Australia's kinda strict about who they let live there. They don't have a Statue of Liberty with the whole "Bring me your tired, your poor" sort of mentality (which, of course, we uphold with such pride these days). No, you need to prove that you can contribute to their society rather than being a drain on their resources. No bums need apply.

So I did some research. Looks good! According to Booklet 6: General Skilled Migration, I qualify because:

1. I'm under 45.

2. I hold a passport issued by the United States of America (or at least, I will once I apply for a new one, since the old one is lost and defunct). This apparently proves I have a good grasp of the English language. Though judging by the students who pass through my classroom, US citizenship isn't necessarily a guarantee of such a thing.

3. I have a Masters degree, which means I hold "a post secondary degree equivalent to an Australian Bachelors Degree (or higher)" (7). I also have an occupation that is listed on page 7 of the Skilled Occupation List ("Teacher – Secondary School Teacher"), which awards me 60 skill points (whatever that means), which is the highest number any occupation has. Sounds like I'm in like gravy.

4. I have pay stubs to prove that I "have been in paid employment in a skilled occupation on the SOL (form 1121i Skilled Occupation List (SOL) and Employer Nomination Scheme Occupation List (ENSOL)) for at least 12 months in the 24 months immediately before applying. This period of employment must have been accrued when [I was] in the workplace." Yeppers.

So all that's left is to take the Skills Assessment. I'm good at tests. Very good at tests.

Lauren, clean up that guest room! I'm moving in!

4 bits of love:

Eric said...

So as I first read, I was intrigued by the simple fact: Australia. Confused? Yes. Tired? Yes. Almost miss that little April Fool's tag at the bottom? Most definitely. Only until I reread you were moving down under to wear cute sandals, although I would do it too, did I notice that you were probably yankin' my chain. Quite a tug, quite a tug.

mom said...

Dream on! It's a good dream. Must have been fun making that "poisson d'avril" -- I didn't even notice until I read what Eric said, but then I recognized your imaginative flight of fancy right away, Drama Woman.

Lauren said...

Actually, it's quite difficult.
You have to pass a knowledge test to become a citizen. The test includes questions like:

Who was Phar Lap?

What is a Baggy Green?

Who was Australia's first prime minister?


Very difficult, even for most Aussies.

TeacherMommy said...

Sounds like our citizenship test, which most of our high school graduates would flunk. Maybe the fifth graders would get it. We even have a game show here in the good old US of A called "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?" because, apparently, most of us aren't.

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