Diapers and Dragons

Monday, January 11, 2010

Sometimes It's All About Being One More, and Sometimes It's About Being One Less

I have made a crucial decision.

January sucks. 

Okay, that's not a decision. That's the reason for the decision. Let me get there.

January 2009 was the month when I hit just about rock bottom and disappeared (somewhat literally, especially from the point of view of my workplace) and somehow had to figure out a way to crawl back out of the hole I'd created.

January 2010, while certainly nowhere near the depths of last year, is not exactly going swimmingly. Eleven days in and I'm wondering when the gods are going to let up on whatever it is they're ticked about. I'm sure there's some sort of symbolic retribution and hubris and whatnot involved, but it bothers me that centuries after all that went out of style (you know, with the whole Fall of Rome and what I can only assume was the advent of Ragnarok since the Norse gods haven't exactly been showing up lately) the ghosts of capritious deities past are still messing around with the lives of mortals.

Why yes, I have been working on my Mythology exam. Your point is?

January was named after the Roman god Janus, one of the few of their gods not adapted from Greek culture, who was the god of beginnings/archways/doors. Apparently, Janus does not like me. He seems to be presenting me with the beginnings of bedlam, the doorways to doom, the archways to angst.

I'd really rather not.

So I think I'm going to get rid of January.

Just, you know, cut it out. Kaput. Gone. Hasta la vista. I'm going to stick to eleven months, which really is a better number than twelve, what with being prime and a nice double number. Neat. Orderly.

I know, I know, you probably wonder what my deal is with months, and perhaps (please, God!) things will exceed my low expectations like November did and the holidays did and all that, but for now...

You see my year? This one goes to eleven.

6 bits of love:

Kathleen said...

Well, I was going to comment on the post below, but then clicked over and here was a new one. It was supposed to say all your troubles were gone and you have a new lease on life!!!

What I was going to say is that I hope you are able to sweat out all of your anxieties in that workout later, which means you only have a couple more hours to experience the miserable drudgery and then it will be over!!

Since you like the number 11 so much and today is the 11th, may I suggest that once these first 11 days are over, things will look up? I hope that happens.

And since I am rambling, I'll end by sending some hugs and prayers up your way!

Unknown said...

May I suggest that you stop thinking about the mythological gods and maybe spend some time communing with the Real God? Just a thought.

mom said...

I'm with the two before me!

And who says you've lost your sense of humor?! It's coming through here, snarky and dark, but it's there. And wow am I glad you at least have zumba. I think if you check a few things off that must-do list, talk to an understanding friend (or therapist!), and then follow Arby's suggestion, you'll make it through this day and even the next ones.

You probably don't want advice, just sympathy. Believe me you have that! It's so hard to be so far away from you at times like this. So we do what we can (and you know what that is). I love you!

GingerB said...

Here is my tip: don't hang out with the guys getting stopped at airport security with foil wrapped vegetables.

Dorset Dispatches said...

I'd take out Feburary myself. Miserable excuse for a month. Can't even be a proper length or anything.

My Mum would axe September. I guess the answer is a year where you can take the month that you like the least out. Would please everyone. x

Anonymous said...

I agree - January sucks! I your extra-long February is a great one! (now that January is gone).
- SoccerSister

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