Diapers and Dragons

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Bungee Jumping

Life has been like this for me lately. And I don't like bungee jumping--I have a terrible fear of heights and free fall--so this is not excitement and adventure for me. I have been at some of the highest highs and lowest lows of my entire life this last week. I don't know if there's ever been a point when I've been taken to such extremes in such a brief space of time before.

I can't talk about the details. They're too intimate, too personal, and would betray some of the people I love the most in the world, including myself. Emotionally, I've reached a point of near numbness, not sure where to turn or what to say or do that would fix all the things that have gone so very wrong and get back what was so very right. I've been crying out to God, greats bursts of wordless need because I don't even know how to put my emotions into words, don't know how to do more than offer it up because it's more than I can handle and utterly out of my control.

If I'm silent here for a while, it's because I can't speak. But if you have words to offer me, please do. I just can't promise a reply.

6 bits of love:

Kathleen said...

Oh, TeacherMommy, I will be praying, praying for you! If you ever need to talk, I'm just a Facebook (or even a phone call!) away.

Love and Hugs,

Meghan said...

praying for you, misty.

Heidi said...


Not sure what's going on, but you're in my thoughts. E-mail me if you need to vent.

Hilary Hall said...

I don't know what's going on but I can relate to the ups and downs of everything. This whole year has been that way for me. I definitely don't wish it on anybody. I hope things get better for you quickly.

Anonymous said...

You know that I'm praying "always." And I think the most hopeful thing in all of this is your attitude, believe it or not. God understands wordless prayers, by the way. If you need someone to pray with, to help you verbalize, please call me or someone else who can accompany you. Read Ps. 139 -- there is no where, no highest heights or deepest lows -- where God is not there. And he truly cares, arms open wide. I love you. TM's mom

Anonymous said...

"So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long distance away, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him."(Luke 15:20)He is alway there not just waiting but running toward you, arms open wide for you and computer daddy! Love you and praying for you! TM's dad

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