Diapers and Dragons

Monday, September 27, 2010

I Think I'm Less Like A Helicopter And More Like A Bus. You Know: Get Them There. Get Them Home. Sit Down And Shut Up. THAT Kind.

I am questioning the wisdom of being a parent even more now. No really, because it's too much work. Here I thought that since DramaBoy  is growing up and I no longer have to dress him or wipe his butt or unbuckle him in the car or even bathe him (first solo shower this weekend! WOOT!!!) that somehow my parental responsibilities were going to be reduced.

And then I started getting the newsletters from his kindergarten teacher.

Maybe I should start calling them news-novelettes, because really. I swear it takes longer to read them than it does for me to write one of these posts, and I'm a ridiculously quick speed-reader, peoples.

I would also like to know when homework started requiring so much parental involvement. I don't remember my own parents being quite so involved, though maybe it doesn't fully count because my mother was my teacher for most of elementary BUT NOT KINDERGARTEN and since I don't remember (a) having that much homework and (b) my parents being involved, I feel rather ill-used at this point. I don't know what I resent more: my parents not having to help me much back then or my having to help DramaBoy so much. Probably the latter. Because it's more work.

This is also complicated by the whole split custody thing, because The Ex and I have to divide what each person does and communicate and all that fun stuff. It's a good thing we're practically friendly these days, because the whole cooperating thing works a lot better that way.

Maybe I'm a little extra resentful this week because The Ex is going on a short vacation so I have the boys an extra weekday, which isn't a big deal really because I love them and stuff, but it means that I have MORE HOMEWORK TO DO WITH DRAMABOY!!!

Also, I am already behind in grading papers both because I'm always behind in grading papers and also because my National Honors Society slave student assistant has been sick and therefore unavailable to assist me. Plus there's so much more Life to my Personal Life these days. All this to mean that I have lots of homework of my own that I should be doing and having DramaBoy's homework getting in the way is not the kind of excuse for which I am searching. Not that I don't look for excuses, you see; it's more that I want excuses that involve more Fun and less Frustration.

Because seriously, have you ever tried to get a wiggly not-quite-five-year-old sit at a table and do his homework?

Let's just say that it didn't surprise me AT ALL to read his weekly goal sheet and see that the teacher wrote DramaBoy's main goals as "paying attention and following instructions in class and finishing work assigned."

MTL may have had a sarcastic comment about it, actually. To follow mine. BECAUSE WE'RE AWESOME LIKE THAT, THAT'S WHY.

Somehow I don't think teachers need to worry about either of us being helicopter parents.

May I please get back to just handing out the homework instead of being on the receiving end?

It's going to be a looooooong fifteen years.*

*Because The Widget will start two years after DramaBoy, that's why. I CAN COUNT. I just don't like to help my kids do it. I know. I'M SUCH AN AWESOME PARENTAL ROLE MODEL. Shut up.

3 bits of love:

GingerB said...

Hey, check out those new pix in the sidebar! MTL, in the flesh! Handsome!! And DramaBoy and the Widget look so much more grownup. When will the Dark One appear? So, will I get to stop wiping Claie's butt soon? Because I'd be willing to take on homework if she'd care for her own bum. It is, after all, hers. And she absolutely does not have the hand strength and size to do her own car seat buckles because she is so wee - most of her friends can, but then, they also weigh 40+ pounds and can go in a booster, and Claire, who is probably a few months younger than DramaBoy, weighs 28 pounds and may be in the large infant car seat for the next three years. Sigh. Homework?!? Is this copying letters and numbers?

Teacher Mommy said...

GingerB, my email-less darling reader and bloggy friend (hint hint):

MTL indeed! And thank you (because I'm going to take this as a compliment on my taste), I agree, he is handsome! "Hot" was the word that popped into my mind the first time I saw him, actually. :P

The Dark One will appear once I have a decent photo of her. She wasn't on our recent zoo trip, from whence those other photos came, so I am lacking in that regard.

And I do so wish I was clairevoyant (hehehe, pun so intended) enough to tell you when your butt-wiping duties will be over. I do sympathize.

Homework: there are letters and numbers, but it's not just copying these days, oh no. It's Hard Things like Identifying Patterns and Spelling Words and Learning To Read.

Have I mentioned that I'm much better with the high school level than I am with little ones? Sigh.

Draft Queen said...

Seriously: I loathe my kids' homework far more than my own. It's unreasonable.

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